To Be a Family
by queenofquills
Summary: "What is he, mommy?" He has gone to Hell and back. He lost his brother once, now he's too afraid to lose his growing family. She doesn't know who she loves. And he is blind to first love's deception. This is a story of a family, and it starts and ends at the hands of one woman. Kagome Higurashi.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter One**

Or

_Chemistry of a Car Crash_

"Kagome, where are you off to?"

Kagome Higurashi swirled on her foot, nearly missing Souta's head while she carried a mop over her shoulder. "You remember what day it is, right?" She said in disbelief, looking at her watch.

Miss Higurashi gave a smile. "But with the mop, dear?"

A series of mumbled curses and a dropped mop later and she finally had a moment to herself in the shack. Souta hadn't followed her like he usually did when he ignored their mother's warnings and Kagome's exasperated pleas. That was something but she missed his constant questions and concerns now in the silence that lingered. She was just picking up her bag to jump in when a thought occurred.

Why should she even keep going?

_How can you even ask yourself that question? He has a right to know._

_He never came back. Not once._

She looked different; shouldn't he see it? She felt different; shouldn't he be there to feel it too? Everything was all so wrong because they'd told her he wouldn't be coming back to see her again. Kagome placed her knee on the lip of the well, but she went no further. "Sis?" Souta Higurashi stood just outside the doorway, the light from the sun bathing him in a glow. She couldn't believe how old he was now. Just shy of starting high school himself. She wondered how her own mother could cope with two of her children growing up before completely giving in to the realization.

Kagome wondered if she, too, would feel this way about her child.

"It's okay, Souta," she sniffed.

"You're crying, Kagome," he pointed out, worried.

"I said it's alright," Kagome said, firmly, and shooed him off. He was right; another tear slid down her face. She didn't even feel them. Souta threw her one last look of concern but left her alone. So, she would go. She was going.

Sango didn't know how much longer she could take this waiting. It was obvious by the way Miroku and Shippo paced around the well that he felt the same way. Checking her watch, a gift from Kagome, something was different. "What if she doesn't want to come? What if she changed her mind? I'm not good with change, Sango!" She rolled her eyes.

"You're not good with anything, leech," she growled. Shippo laughed. In her heart, Sango did agree with him on this one. Kagome was never late a day in her life. Not especially with the recent things going on. She smiled to herself. A girl like Kagome was to be admired for her bravery, no matter the mistakes she's made.

"Ouch. Where is she?" Miroku complained again.

"Relax. The stork probably left the baby at her house instead of here," Shippo said matter-of-factly.

To which Miroku stared at him.

"The stork," Sango reminded him, "the one Kagome told him about."

"Yeah! He brings the baby in a blanket—sometimes a basket, if you can afford it—and you get to name the baby and everything. Kagome said the baby only comes on two conditions: if you love someone and if you have been a very good person." Shippo glowed with pride from his newly acquired information. So proud, in fact, that Miroku couldn't take it upon himself to dampen his spirits, so he nodded.

"I guess I haven't been as good a person as Kagome, then," Miroku grumbled, scratching his chin. Sango shook her head and crossed her arms.

"You have no idea."

Enter: Kagome.

She had been there for merely a minute, hiding at the bottom of the well while Shippo echoed her very words from eight months ago when she decided to tell him. That was the very same day where…

"Hi, gang," she greeted with a wave.

"Kagome!" They cheered in unison, Shippo jumping into her arms and Sango wrapping hers around the girl's neck. Miroku held back all of two seconds before he, too, embraced his friend. She felt so much love in that moment that it caused more tears to come to her amber eyes.

"Oh, Kagome, please don't cry," Sango sniffled. She turned into Miroku's arms as her own eyes began to fill. Shippo looked from one girl, to the other, and crinkled his tiny nose.

"Where's the baby? I thought you said I'd get to see him the next time you came!"

Miroku chose that time to laugh. Kagome bent down and ruffled his red hair. "He's coming, Shippo. Not just yet, though. Sango told me you were making something for him, though. Wanna show me?" She straightened up at his smile. Shippo was easy to talk to; easy to please. A great kid, and Kagome was beginning to feel more like his mother than an older sister to him. She thought she liked it very much.

"I forgot!" Shippo took her hand, being old enough now to reach. _Just about the size Souta was when he was Shippo's age,_ Kagome reflected before letting herself be led away from the well.

"When do you think she'll ask about him, Miroku?" Sango asked as they followed the two, watching them laugh and talk about things going on in their lives. Her stomach was doing flips just thinking of the inevitable. Miroku kissed her wrist lovingly.

"I think she's been asking herself this whole time," he replied grimly. He didn't like the question any more than he liked to hide their love from Shippo and Kagome but both seemed to be impossible to prolong. "Only, we don't have answers for her. Not this time."

"I'm glad she missed him," Sango growled, her cheeks hot with anger. "It would have broken her heart."

Shippo's ears perked up at the conversation going on behind them. He had one ear to Kagome's chattering about her home schooling and one to the words Sango had spoken. His tiny shoulders slumped. "What's wrong, Shippo?"

"Nothing. I miss you lots of times, Kagome. I wish you could stay here," he sighed sadly. It was true enough; he missed his best friend. Life wasn't the same if they weren't going off on adventures together. With Naraku defeated and Sesshomaru subsided, nothing challenged them anymore and nothing excited the fox. He actually had to make friends his own age now.

Kagome stopped them. She knelt down. "Shippo, why did you tell me you were okay with this arrangement before if you weren't?" Her voice was soft—mother-like. She made sure to look him in the eyes, no matter how much he tried to avoid hers.

At first, no answer. Then, "they said you'd be back soon. But you didn't come back for months. Then, you came back and you looked different. You look different now. Your belly is huge and you always seem…"

"What?"

"You seem sad," he inhaled a big breath, and dropped his gaze back to the ground.

_So, I haven't been fooling anybody,_ Kagome thought. _But more importantly, I hurt my little guy's feelings. I have to make it right!_

Impulsively, when Sango and Miroku reached them, she turned and announced something so very life altering and joyous at the same time. "I'm not leaving ever again."

Unfortunately, that was when Inuyasha descended from the tree above them with one leap. He straightened up and glared at them with naked danger in his red eyes.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two**

Or

"_Chances"_

"Kagome, get behind me!"

It all happened in slow motion.

She grabbed Shippo; Shippo grabbed Sango and they all ducked as Inuyasha lashed out to strike them with a powerful swipe. He only succeeded in brandishing Miroku's cheek with a wide cut. A line of blood disappeared behind his kimono. Kagome screamed as his claws came an inch close to her face, only to be stopped by Miroku's staff. He pushed Inuyasha away, but not for long.

_Full-fledged demon_, Kagome thought. She shivered.

It all happened in slow motion. "Take Shippo and run," Sango shouted. And she only turned around for three seconds. Just three seconds but it was enough to pierce her in the back and get her to her knees. The slayer reached out for Kagome's outstretched hand, who couldn't fight the scream tearing its way out her throat.

"_Sango!" _

Sango removed her hands from her heart and blood stained the skin. She coughed. More blood, and Kagome pressed Shippo against her chest to shield him from the sight. "Shippo, take Kagome and run," were her last words before she collapsed.

"No," Kagome whispered, ignoring Shippo's pleas to leave with him as she crawled over to the fallen friend. Inuyasha and Miroku battled in the background, but it was obvious that one would have to back down sooner or later and Miroku wasn't a demon, now was he? Kagome pressed her ear to Sango's chest, but nothing could be heard. Not a beat. A fresh wave of tears spilled down her cheeks but she wouldn't relent. "Come back to me, Sango. Please don't leave like this. Do me a favor and get up. Get up, Sango_, get up!"_

"We have to leave. Now, come on," Shippo urged, tugging on her shirt. He didn't know it then, but saving her life would mean saving the life of her baby, as well, because where she was now, wasn't safe for either of them. Kagome cradled Sango on her lap, sobs racking her body with a pain she'd never felt before.

This was entirely different than a friend losing themselves; this was a friend who was gone forever. Shaking, the raven-haired girl lifted her head just in time to catch Inuyasha's look. What she saw made her blood run cold.

A smile. Shippo got her to her feet, and they were running away from Miroku and the monster. To Kagome, he was no longer someone she promised to protect with all her life and _fell in love with_, but no better than the demons they'd faced long ago. The greedy, evil, conniving bastards who once inhabited these lands but were reduced to ash.

All she wanted now was to get Shippo as far away as possible from Inuyasha. Then, get his baby out of her and far away from _her _as possible. Because what once was love—wasn't, any longer. And no infant made out of love would be subjected to the hate she now harbored in her heart for its father.

(Nine Years Later)

"Shiori, get down from there!"

A little girl with raven-hair and golden eyes frowned at her mother's request. She was currently up in the highest blossom tree they had in the back yard and because it was a nice day and because their castle was boring and dark and filled with people who didn't know how to have fun if it poked them in the bum, nine-year-old Shiori climbed a tree.

But it wasn't her first time, she would swear, and when mama was gone—she climbed it all the time and back down and never got a single scratch on her to prove it. However, she did as told, and started to come down.

Only something went wrong just this once. The trick of the sunlight, or a misstep, but Shiori fell down, down, down and heard her mama screaming.

She looked doomed, but Kagome watched with a jolt of her heart as something miraculous happened. Someone saved her baby girl. She heard a muffled cry of relief before her feet reacted next. Shiori broke away from the stranger's arms and leapt into her mother's, shaking, though she didn't cry. She wouldn't do such a weak thing in front of a stranger—like her daddy taught her. Kagome held the little thing tight to her, stilling her shakes with kisses all over her face. "Oh, my baby," she kept chanting quietly. To the strange man, it seemed like she was trying to convince herself that whatever just happened—happened.

Kagome would have to face the man sometime. She looked up with all the gratitude in the world, but froze. He was familiar like an old portrait. Only he could make her heart beat irregularly whereas all the pictures were long burnt and held nothing but painful bearings. She opened her mouth to scream a 'get out' but the words didn't form nearly fast enough as, "go play, Shiori."

"But mama," Shiori complained, all the while watching the strange man. He smelled of blood, and she didn't like him. In fact, a low growl let them both know just how appreciative she was about her life being spared by a mere stranger. If it came down to it, she would protect her beautiful mama at any cost—like her father taught her to do. He would come home and the first thing he would do was hug her tightly and glow with pride whenever she'd promised him she was keeping her mama safe. Now away on business, Shiori's vows were really put to the test today. **She would not let him down. **

Another, "go play, sweetie," and she retreated inside the castle, running up to her bedroom as fast as possible to watch from there. But first, she snuck a cinnamon bun from the kitchens and then went on her way.

"You know you can't be here," Kagome said firmly, now that they were alone. A million reasons for why but the first one to come and go would be that he broke her heart. And she would not permit him to break that of a nine-year-old's. "This is your brother's land and he'll kill you." Maybe if she injected enough threat into her words, he would get the message.

Oh, those eyes would be the death of her, though. Inuyasha stepped towards her, inhaling sharply with each step. His eyes sparked golden, and not the crimson she was accustomed to after all these years. After closing her eyes every night. Her natural instinct was to stay poised and ready to attack if the need should come to that.

All too soon, he collapsed into her arms, and she caught him in the nick of time. Turning him around, his head rest just against her shoulder as his body relaxed. "Huh," she murmured, stroking his cheek. There was a cut above his eyebrow and, scooting the fabric down just a little further, three gashes across his chest. He was bleeding something fierce and Kagome couldn't turn him away in this condition. She would, of course, turn him away just as soon as he was awake but until then…

"What_ is_ he, mama?"

Shiori was helping her mother tend to the man in one of the spare bedrooms now. She saw how he'd been hurt and wanted to help her, even if it was to help him. She held a bowl of warm water and soap while Kagome dabbed at the cuts on Inuyasha's face. He was awake now, watching her every movement. She wished he wouldn't do that but stiffened against her foolishness.

_I'm not the same doe-eyed girl he met. He can't make me feel like an idiot anymore. I was the idiot but no more! _

"Just someone, Shiori, that's all."

By that tone of voice, Shiori knew not to ask anymore questions. She preoccupied herself with humming. Inuyasha's ears perked up at the sweet sound. "I know that song," he murmured for the first time since arriving in their lives. Kagome nearly dropped her rag and Shiori stopped humming altogether. Her amber eyes widened.

"You do?" She was excited.

He nodded and Shiori smiled. "Will you…sing it with me? Mama doesn't like to sing much," she leaned towards him and whispered, "she's the only one who knows the song. She used to sing it to me all the time but now she doesn't."

Irritated by the closeness of the two, Kagome pressed firmly on a particularly nasty cut on his shoulder and he winced, causing Shiori to reel back as if it were her fault. She glanced up at her mother. "Why don't you find Uncle and let him know someone else will be joining us for dinner, okay?" Kagome dabbed her button nose with soap and got a giggle out of the girl.

When she was gone, the young woman straightened up, pouring the water out the window and leaving the curtains opens. "A little sun never hurt more than it healed," she explained without him really asking. He calculated all her movements. Graceful, yet exhausted. She was clearly tired from something but, then again, he had turned up without a story to his name.

"I'm okay to leave," he spoke up, already trying to get out of the bed. The pain was brief and sharp, but he didn't show any of that on his face. Kagome knew, anyway. She always knew. She pushed him back down onto the bed and frowned.

"Are you crazy?" Kagome hissed. "You were almost dead. You've been asleep for hours."

He stared up at her in wonder. "Why are you doing this?"

"Why are you here?"

She got him there. There was silence while she changed his bandages.

"Is she yours? She keeps calling you her mother, anyway."

Kagome nodded. "Her name's Shiori. She's nine." She hoped that wasn't too much information. If her baby girl knew her father wasn't the man away meeting with another Lord and her father was this weakened demon in the room, it would not only break her heart, but make her hate her mother forever.

Maybe Kagome was being selfish but she felt entitled to be after everything that happened.

"She's beautiful," Inuyasha said on impulse. He meant it, too, because he gripped her hand and squeezed it. Kagome looked into his eyes, sighed sadly, and pulled away.

"Don't touch me like that," she whispered, moving towards the door. "Don't touch me at all."

"I-I'm sorry," he stammered while she closed the door to his apologies.


End file.
